Since I turned 30…

Since I turned 30…

  1. I have given up all experiments that test will power.
    Hell, I turned 30, didn’t I? What more do I need to prove now?
  2. I know it’s perfectly normal to start chanting when chanting seems called for. Like in moments of undue stress – at traffic jams, in the midst of an argument with a half-wit.
    My favourite chant goes something like this Aum… Manamanamanamana… where the Aum is slightly drawn out. It is surprisingly effective in shutting up people.
  3. I am all magnanimous and kind with the half-wits now.
    They will get mud on their face in due course. Why speed up karma?
  4. I am resigned to falling ill on cold days or days when I step out of the house.
    Resignation is (the new) power.
  5. I know nihilism and M.K. Gandhi’s My Experiments With Truth (MEWT), are the only two sure-shot cures for insomnia.
    Ever since I adopted nihilistic thought, I have slept like a baby. On days I became ambitious or alive, I’ve had to read two paras of MEWT to fall asleep.
  6. I have accepted that my body is going to be more fat than fit on any given day.
    Curves are in. In my head. The bigger your curves, the inner you are. In my head.
  7. I have reaffirmed the universal truth that ‘in my head’ is all that counts.
    All the rest of the people in the universe are mere symbols to my plot or scrawls to my calligraphy.
  8. I know I cannot write. Or read. Or speak. Today’s language.
    I have become one of those people who start every conversation with, ‘Back in my times…’ because, of course, nothing that happens today is good enough for anything. Back in my times, we really knew how to write, read, and speak.
  9. I have learnt that the best way to enjoy long-lasting relationships with people is to let them do all the work.
    Let them fall in love/friendship, nurture the relationship, work on the issues, have the arguments; I will just breathe and let them and enjoy.
  10. I also take it for granted that whatever I said last is the last word on any subject, in any argument. Because see 7. And if their fiction still intrudes, I chant.

Six months or thereabouts (numbers haven’t been my strong suit) of turning 30, I am a calmer person. And I don’t even do yoga (ha! take that!) except to breathe. And chant.

And that’s all.

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About Bhumika's Boudoir

I love to laugh, and end up being a part of high drama and stormy emotion even when I don't pursue it. Being creative, and communicating with people get me going. I enjoy all the good things in life especially those that are slightly risque, and apologise little, if ever, for all that I do. Literature is a passion and so is music.
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4 Responses to Since I turned 30…

  1. Sanchita Nanaya says:

    ‘in my head’ is also my favourite “-ism”. My most interesting and meaningful conversations happen ‘in my head’. Back in “our” time, that’s how it used to be. Do you not agree?

    Like

  2. Marvin Grey says:

    BFF. Why are you turning 30 in winter?

    Curves have been in since men and women lived in caves. Cavemen learnt very quickly that size zero women never survived the courtship of being clubbed with a club. In fact size zero females were extinct until kellogs, subway and the chemicals used to print cosmo mutuated the human genome.

    In my head works well. It has kept me sane. I make more sense to me that most people I meet.

    Like

    • BFF, I am already 30. And it is winter. Time for reflection and whatever else. Clubbed with a club is not my favourite part of foreplay. Sigh, I have to do something about looking frail and waifish now. đŸ˜¦

      Like

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